Papa Bear (Finding Fatherhood Book 1) Page 4
She’d never forgive herself, and he wouldn’t forgive her either if her past cost him the ability to adopt Angel. Feeling sick, she followed him into the house a few minutes later, putting the casserole dish on the stove and turning it on to preheat. “You just need to bake it for forty-five minutes once the preheating period is over. I’m going to go home. I don’t feel well all of a sudden.”
He looked concerned, and it was difficult not to shrug off his arms when he wrapped them around her. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to accept the comfort in his embrace, but doing so made it harder to break things off, and she knew now she’d have to do that. Why hadn’t she realized it before? She should have known his adoption of Angel hadn’t been finalized, so he’d still be subjected to random checks, and everyone in his life would be under scrutiny.
It was the way it should be to ensure the child’s safety, but it meant she was losing both of them. She was shocked he couldn’t physically hear her heart breaking, because she was half-convinced there was a cracking sound in her chest as she pulled herself away from him. It took everything she had not to burst into tears or show there was something more going on than physical illness. She needed time to regroup and decide on a strategy for ending things as quickly as possible. There couldn’t be a clean break, because it was going to leave her a raw, gaping wound to lose the two people who had come to mean so much to her in such a short amount of time, but maybe she could minimize his suffering and hurt when she dumped him.
“Why don’t you lie down here? I don’t like the idea of you being alone when you aren’t feeling well.”
She shook her head. “I don’t want to make the baby sick, and I’d really prefer my own bed. I’m going home now.” Without further explanation or exchange of words, she moved past him and down the hallway, breathing raggedly when she stepped onto the porch and walked down the stairs a moment later.
She was certain he followed her to the door, but he didn’t go any farther, and that made it easier to escape. She started out walking at a normal pace, but the farther she got from his house, the more her speed increased until she arrived at the tea shop, using the back entrance to go to her apartment.
As soon as she closed the door behind her and engaged the locks, sobs burst from her, and she sank to the floor as she buried her face in her knees and cried for everything she’d lost in the blink of an eye. They had never really been hers, but that didn’t make it hurt any less to lose Lucas, Angel, and the shadowy future she’d been allowing to coalesce in front of her, ignoring what she’d known all along. She wasn’t good enough for him, and she never should have allowed her resolve to weaken to start with.
Chapter Four
Lucas was incredibly frustrated by Libby’s abrupt withdrawal and avoidance of him. He’d been certain they were on track to build a strong relationship, one where he could eventually tell her she was his mate and show her he was a bear-shifter. But for the last five days, she had avoided him or shut down any attempts to see her. He wasn’t sure if he was imagining it, but even Angel seemed to miss her presence, being fussier and less happy than usual.
He experienced an odd sense of déjà vu as he climbed the stairs to her shop, remembering a similar scenario when he’d eventually gotten her to agree to give their relationship a try. He wasn’t optimistic about the outcome, but he needed to know what was going on in her head. She couldn’t just shut them out like this without an explanation and giving him a chance to try to fix whatever was wrong.
The door on the bell tinkled as he and Angel stepped through it, and she jumped like she’d been shot, her expression quickly turning to a grimace when she saw him coming. “I’m out of matcha tea.”
He darted a glance to the ceramic jar where she kept that particular brew, finding it unlikely it was empty, but it didn’t matter. He wasn’t here for tea.
A quick glance around the store revealed he was the only customer, and he wasn’t there to purchase anything. He placed his palms on the counter and leaned across it, bringing himself closer to her as he looked down at his mate. “What the hell is going on with you?”
Her eyes widened, and then anger clouded her expression. “I don’t know what you mean, but you don’t have a right to come in and yell at me.”
He started to contradict her about the yelling, but he realized his volume had been pretty loud. He took a deep breath, trying to rein in his frustration, and regulated his tone. “I apologize for yelling, but I’m very confused on what’s happening here. We were getting close, and I thought things were going well, and then you just disappeared. You won’t talk to me, and you won’t see me. So I ask again, in a much calmer way, what the hell is going on?”
She drew up her shoulders defensively, her body language radiating rejection. “I don’t want to talk about this.”
He let out a sigh, trying to tamp down his anger. “I think you owe it to me to give me some kind of explanation.”
“I don’t owe you anything. It was a fun fling, but it’s over.”
He couldn’t hold back the sound of exasperation that rumbled from his throat. “That’s crap, and you know it. We both know it, so tell me what happened. Why did you pull back?”
She straightened her shoulders, meeting his gaze with an impassivity that was chilling. “I never should have agreed to dating you to start with. I just came to my senses and realized it wasn’t going to work. You need to accept that gracefully.”
Before he could stop himself, he slammed his hand onto the counter. “You’re lying to me, and I want to know why.” The sudden spike and change in her scent alerted him she was hiding something, and he was briefly frustrated with his bear senses that would allow him to know someone was trying to deceive him without giving him any insight into what the deception was about.
“It’s never going to work between us. I was crazy enough to give in to temptation for a while, but reality intruded, as it always does. Whatever we had is over.”
He was about to retort, but the sound of a gun firing made him freeze. Less than a second later, he scrambled over the counter and pulled Libby into his arms, lying as flat as he could on the ground with the baby strapped to his chest. With his arm around his mate and Angel on his chest, he couldn’t easily access his gun, so all he could do was shield them with his body as shots tore up the store. Judging from the rapidity and the trajectory, he estimated someone was shooting up the store with a machine gun as the car drove by.
The shooting was over in less than ten seconds, but he held her and Angel for another moment, wanting to ensure they weren’t turning around to come back for one more attempt. When he was certain, or reasonably certain anyway, that the shooting was over, he sat up, carefully assisting Libby to a seated position as well.
Shards of ceramic and loose-leaf tea covered both of them and the floor around them. The glass counter that was always so spotless remained structurally intact, though the front panel was shattered. The part they had taken cover behind was made from steel, and he was relieved it had helped shield them. Just to be sure, he pulled the screaming baby from the sling and looked her over, carefully ensuring she had no wounds of any kind, either from flying bullets or shattered glass and ceramic. She simply appeared to be frightened, and he held her against him, rubbing her back as he made a soothing sound while looking at Libby.
She was pale and shaken, and perhaps not in shock, but close to it. The way she trembled was worrisome. “What happened?” she asked, sounding slightly slurred.
“A drive-by shooting is my best guess.” The question was why? Had they been a random target, or was Deacon Hunt pushing back against him for his recent crackdown on the man’s associates and criminal activities as he tried to find proof to put Hunt away for life, or force the man out of hiding? A wave of remorse swept over him as he realized he might be the reason Libby and Angel had just been fired upon. That reminded him he still hadn’t checked her, and he asked, “Are you shot?”
“I don’t know. I don’t think s
o, but my arm hurts.”
He flinched when she presented the wound, appalled by the blood quickly soaking through her white blouse. He couldn’t tell for certain, but it looked like she’d been cut by either a shard of glass or ceramic, though it could have been a bullet graze. The paramedics would have to determine that.
As he picked up his cell phone to call his boss, he was relieved to hear the sound of sirens growing closer in the distance. Ray McCready answered on the first ring, and he quickly apprised him of the situation. He was startled when his boss told him he would be at the scene in just a few minutes. It hardly seemed to warrant the director of their division coming to investigate personally, and the fact Ray was going to do so increased Lucas’s anxiety.
The paramedics and a firetruck arrived a few minutes later, followed by local police. Lucas flashed his badge, answering the questions they asked as he kept a concerned eye on Libby, who sat in the back of an ambulance getting stitched up. She looked better, and he overheard one of the paramedics mentioning he’d removed all the glass, so he let out a small breath he hadn’t been aware of holding when he confirmed his mate hadn’t been shot.
As he was finishing answering questions for the local police, his boss drew up in a dark sedan, sliding out and striding toward him a moment later. Normally no-nonsense, the anxiety his expression revealed heightened Lucas’s when he realized his boss was concerned. He answered the last of the questions before joining Ray, who’d stood a few feet away. He inclined his head to the other man. “Thank you for coming.”
“Of course. How’s the little one?”
Lucas placed a hand on the back of her head, caressing lightly. Angel had fallen asleep during questioning, and he was reassured by her quick return to her routine. He doubted it had left much of an impression on her either way. “She’s fine. We’re all uninjured, except my mat—girlfriend was cut by some flying glass.”
Ray nodded. “It was Hunt, of course.”
Lucas nodded. “That’s what I think too. I’ve been going after him pretty hard, and I guess this is his way of telling me to back off.”
“And you’re going to listen.”
He stiffened at the man’s words, staring at his boss in disbelief. “What? I can’t believe you’re saying that. I owe it to Astoria and Angel to get that scum as deep in jail as possible and for as long as possible.”
Ray nodded. “It’s what we all want, but you aren’t going to do your daughter any good if you get yourself killed trying to bring down that scumbag. The investigation isn’t over, but your part in it is, at least temporarily.”
Aghast, he stared at him for a moment as he gathered his thoughts. “Are you really suspending me for being shot at?”
Ray’s expression softened marginally. “Of course not. It’s nothing official, but I’m strongly suggesting you take your family and leave the city for little while. Have a vacation and let me focus on Hunt. It’s not just you that you’re responsible for now, and I understand your desire for revenge, and wanting to bring down Hunt, but you have to think about that little girl too. And your girlfriend. She was dragged into this mess as well. Deacon Hunt will kill anyone who stands in his way, including his own child, so I highly suggest you remove yourself from the situation just for a little while.”
His first instinct was to argue, because it wasn’t like him to give up or be intimidated by a show of force. In the old days, Deacon’s threat would have done nothing more than piss him off and make him even more determined to bring down the entire operation on the criminal’s head. His boss was right though, and it wasn’t just about him and his agenda now. As much as he wanted to get his hands on Hunt, he needed to think about Angel and Libby’s safety. With a small sigh, he nodded. “I’m not sure where to go though.”
His boss reached into his pocket, pulling out a key ring with two keys, which he held out to him. Lucas took the offering, but his confusion was probably visible in his expression. “What’s this?”
“Faith and I have a little place up in the Cuyamaca Mountains. It’s our retirement plan, and I think it’d be good for you to hole up there for a while. We’ll maintain contact, and I’ll keep you apprised of the investigation, but it’s the safest place that I know of, and without you to focus on, Deacon Hunt will turn his attention to those of us investigating.”
He frowned. “Are you okay with that? You have a wife and kids of your own to protect.”
The director nodded. “I’ve already sent Faith and the kids to her mother’s place in Arizona for a little while. I’m going to involve only marshals who are aware of the risks and have either made contingent plans for their family, or have no family to start with. Tim Crosby’s on the list, along with a few others.”
As his boss reeled off a few names, Lucas nodded, satisfied it would be a strong investigative team. “Local police, and probably the FBI, will want to get involved.”
Ray shrugged. “That’s fine as long as they don’t get in my way. We’re going to get this trash put where he belongs, and he won’t be killing anyone else on our watch.”
Lucas held out his hand, shaking his boss’s. “Thank you. This is difficult for me, giving up the investigation, but I couldn’t think of someone more capable to head it up than you.”
Ray shrugged. “We’re going to get him and make it stick this time, that I promise. Now why don’t you pack up your family and get out of here while there’s still a strong police presence? With the emergency services here, they aren’t too likely to try again.”
Lucas nodded his agreement and with a word of parting, slipped away from his boss. He moved with purpose toward the ambulance, where Libby stood outside of it now instead of seated inside. There was a bulky bandage on her arm, and the paramedic had cut away the sleeve on that side. She still looked pale, but steadier on her feet. He stopped beside her, looking at the paramedic, who was writing up a report. “How is she?”
The paramedic briefly glanced up. “She’ll definitely live. I’d feel better if she went to the hospital and got a unit of blood, but she’s refusing. It’s not crucial, and she’s certainly not going to drop dead without it.”
Lucas flinched at the words, wondering if the man was always so careless with his phrasing, or if he was just irritated with Libby’s stubbornness. From the tilt of her chin and the compression of her lips, he was certain she’d dug in her heels and refused further medical treatment. He thought about arguing with her, but he knew there was a bigger fight ahead of him—getting her to come with him and Angel to the cabin.
The EMT finished writing and looked up at Libby again. “Don’t forget to drink some orange juice and eat something sweet, followed by a good round of protein. You’ve just donated blood the hard way.”
She laughed slightly before thanking him for his time. After the paramedic moved away, heading toward the cab of the ambulance, which was running and clearly ready to depart, Lucas braced himself. “How are you?”
She shrugged her uninjured side. “Like he said, I’ll live. It hurts a little bit, but he gave me a shot for the pain, so I’m good for now.”
“Good. You could help me by telling me what to pack for you.”
She arched a brow. “What to pack for what?”
“My boss is putting me on vacation, because it’s clear I’m a target of Deacon Hunt, and he’s willing to take out anyone important to me to get to me. That includes you, so you need to come with us. We’re going to a secluded cabin, and we’ll be safe there.”
She shook her head. “I really don’t think I need to come with you. Whoever shot up my store probably just saw you enter. They have no reason to think I mean anything to you at all.”
“They won’t care about what you mean to me, and they’re not going to take time to ask questions, unless it’s to interrogate you for my location. Unfortunately, even being on the peripheral of the situation has involved you in it, and the only way to keep you safe is to get out of here for a while.”
She looked like she wa
nted to continue arguing, but after a moment, she nodded. “You’re right, but I don’t need to go with you. I have a friend in San Joaquin, and I can just stay with her for a little while.”
The word rumbled from his chest and up through his throat, emerging as a growl. “No. You’re staying with us. I’m not going to trust your safety to anyone but me.”
She glared at him. “You can’t tell me what to do. I’m willing to concede I could be slightly at risk, and I’ll make sure I’m out of the path, but there’s no reason for me to go with you and Angel.”
He made an effort to soften his tone. “Please, Libby, I’m asking you to come with us. If you aren’t there, I’m going to spend my whole time worrying about you, and I need to know you’re safe. I need you to come with us. Please.”
For just a moment, he thought she would continue arguing as her shoulders squared, and she opened her mouth. Her gaze darted to Angel, and then back to him, and her shoulders slumped forward in defeat. “Fine, but this changes nothing. Whatever we had is over.”
He didn’t bother to argue with her statement, and he certainly didn’t agree to it. They were nowhere near over, but he had to get her somewhere safe before he could focus on salvaging the relationship and trying to figure out what had caused the division to start with.
Chapter Five
It was nearly a two-hour drive up to the cabin, and Libby feigned sleep for most of it so she could avoid the conversation Lucas so clearly wanted to have. She had no idea what to say to him, but she had to maintain her resolve. Going into the mountains alone with him seemed like the stupidest thing she could do, but when he’d asked her with that open concern in his expression, and the vulnerability in his tone, she’d been unable to withstand his request, and she’d found herself yielding.